I have had kids deathly

Deb Sweeney — Fri, 20 Apr 2007 20:07:06 -0500

I have had kids deathly afraid of baths and swimming, but that doesn't sounds like the issue here. This sounds like a need for orderliness and or a fear of people making mistakes or "doing what they are not supposed to do." Abby (4) also dislikes getting water on her clothes though she loves to swim.

My kids seemed to go through stages where this was more of an issue. For example if a crumb was broken off the corner of a granola bar they would have a fit it was not "right" or if they spilled they burst into tears. It's like they realize they can't control everything in life and feel anxious about it. It's also a personality thing, some people (including some kids) are just more upset by curveballs that others, and some are just plain intense (especially girls in my experience). You might think about whether change or unexpected things bother her in other areas. She could also be sensitive to feel of wet clothes or worried they are ruined.

Unless the fear is so bad that she avoids water (like, won't wash hands at school because she's afraid it might spill)I would just try to give her models for handling it that are alternatives to a freakout. "Oh darn it, I spilled on my shirt, I need a towel." Or reflect the feeling "You don't like it when the water splashes all over. Let's wipe that up" or "Let's try to turn it on more gently like this so it won't splash." Even try some humor when she gets wet "Gee, do you think we should have worn our swimsuits to the water fountain today?" -- sometimes the ridiculousness makes kids laugh it off. You could show her how to work the clothes dryer too so she feels like she has some control of the situation and knows it's not permanent. She should cope better with everything in life as she gets older.

Good luck!

Have any of your kids had a

Karla — Wed, 21 Mar 2007 15:01:13 -0500

Have any of your kids had a fear of water? My daughter gets extremely upset if she spills a drop of water on her clothes or if the kids at school are washing their hands and spill water on the floor. She doesn't fear swimming pools, however.

Any suggestions?

(Karla Wennerstrom is the editor of the Eden Prairie News. She can be reached at editor@edenprairienews.com.)

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I have had kids deathly

Have any of your kids had a